I'm an avid consumer. Yes, you may thank Magick Sandwich for keeping our economy moving. Like a freight train. Or a bowel movement. Occasionally, I like to recoup some of my losses by selling used books, games and such on Amazon. Recently, I sold one of my husband's Xbox 360 games, Frontlines: Fuel of War.
Here's part of the game's description on Amazon:
Frontlines: Fuel of War is an open-world First Person Shooter set on the frontlines of tomorrow. In a world ravaged by a global energy crisis, environmental decay and economic depression, players assume the role of an elite soldier in the Western Coalition Army on an epic crusade against the Red Star Alliance to control the last of the world's oil reserves. This title combines cinematic, non-linear game play, with next generation firepower and the Frontline Combat System to deliver an intense FPS.
There's nothing hinky about selling used video and computer games through Amazon, whether they're violent or not. Amazon encourages it and posts resellers' offers on the same page with its new offering. It's part of what makes listing an item so easy, as opposed to using eBay's system. In any case, I've been doing it for years and it beats the hell out of any trade-in value I could get at a place like Gamestop.
I package it up and run it to the post office. My first sign of trouble is that the automated machine rejects the zip code so I have to wait on line for a clerk. This is always the seventh circle of hell, except I imagine Satan has a more efficient check-in system. Geological time periods later, I am at the window being told that the zip code belongs to a military relay station which normally ships overseas. As such, even though it is on U.S. soil, it is considered an international destination and all mail is subject to search by U.S. Customs.
Since I've already told her the package contains a video game, she says it will probably be red-flagged as material too violent or obscene to be shipped abroad. Amazon's own rules do not permit video games or "adult" material to be shipped overseas by sellers but it does not account for a situation such as this.
The clerk and I are in agreement about the foolishness of our government trying to "protect" a U.S. serviceman from a war game he wants to play. She says she'll ship it anyway and I should keep my fingers crossed that it doesn't get searched.
I return home and email the customer through Amazon to let him know what's up and find out where the game's final destination will be.
Order ID: 058-xxxxx
* Item: 1 of Frontlines: Fuel of War [CD] [Xbox 360]
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Subject: Shipment notification from Amazon seller kathcom
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I took your game to the post office yesterday. They told me I needed a customs declaration on it because it might go overseas. I'm not sure the game will make it through customs, which has all sorts of rules about sending obscene material.
I think it would be pretty ironic if you are not allowed to receive a war game because it's deemed to have obscene levels of violence in it.
Please let me know if you don't receive this within 7-9 business days.
Thanks-
K
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A few hours later, I get this response.
K,
Yeah it is going to be going to iraq. So when would you know if the game doesn't get shipped??
C
I write back and tell him to let me know if he doesn't get it within two weeks and I'll issue a refund. If he gets it after that, I tell him to consider it a gift.
A few weeks later, he emails me and tells me he got it. I understand that it's odd to hope that he enjoys this game when he's in a war zone himself, but I do. I'm glad that with the inattention of U.S. Customs, we have trumped a ridiculous prohibition.
By the way, the designation given to this dangerous game by the Entertainment Software Rating Board (ESRB)? T for TEEN.
So this game is readily available to a kid with nary a hair on his chinny chin chin, but when a guy who's in an actual war wants to buy it, it gets treated like an IED? I think the horse may have left the barn on this one.
I know of only one way to keep our troops safe: bring them home. Happy Memorial Day, everybody.
Labels: Amazon, Frontlines Xbox game, Iraq war, kathcom, magick sandwich, Memorial Day